The Whittling Post Digest - Issue 12

Well, I am writing today in the confident hope that my drinking days are behind me. Three years after I plunged into grief-fuelled, full-blown, full-time alcoholism, consuming a litre of whisky a day, I finally hit a brick wall. You see, the thing that was supposed to be fun, was no long fun. Simple as that. It’s also a lot of work being a dedicated drunk. More work than I was willing to put into it. So, as long as I haven’t fallen off the wagon by the end of this sentence, this is a fresh start for me. Something deep within my soul has just had enough. This fresh start also means I’m back taking in a lot of popular culture, which means I get to write more posts for you fine folks! I’ll also be going back and rewriting a few [story corner] entries, as they were dashed out under the influence. Bless. Drunk Jim is gone for the time being.

So… onwards!

RKO 281

Hmm, a film about a rich old white guy bullying the rest of the world to satisfy his own megalomaniacal desires. Gee, I’m glad that doesn’t happen in this day and age! Oh wait. Anyway, why RKO 281 was a TV movie and not theatrically released Oscar-bait is beyond me. It certainly deserves to be seen on a large screen. The old school 4:3 television aspect ratio gives the frame a level of intimacy 1.85:1 or 2.35:1 would not. Just ask Stanley Kubrick. RKO 281 is about the war of egos between Orson Welles and William Randolph Hurst, over Welles’ semi-biographical motion picture about Hurst, Citizen Kane. I get the feeling the film was British-made, which may explain the television production (we don’t have much of a film industry) and the inclusion of many British actors or US expats. If so, besides some of the bad American accents, you’d never suspect it. While Liev Schreiber’s presence onscreen usually unsettles me, he does a sterling job mixing the talent and arrogance of Welles. James Cromwell is ably menacing as Hurst, although the film goes to great lengths in showing the impact Citizen Kane had on Hurst’s personal life. Failing to note that he, himself, was a private, profit-making gossip-mongerer of the worst sort. John Malkovich is reliably perfect as writer Herman Mankiewicz, so I don’t have much to say about him here. Malkovich is beyond criticism at this point. Melanie Griffith is engrossingly sympathetic as Hurst’s mistress, and Roy Scheider is just the cool motherfucker his always is. Damn, I miss that man. RKO 281 takes great pleasure in recreating sets and shots from its cinematic subject, which surely must have won an award or two. I’m amazed the director, Benjamin Ross, didn’t become the biggest thing in the word after this, as his directing of the actors and camera is pitch perfect and inventive. A genuine treat!

RAZORBACK

I was just over halfway through this visual feast of a film before I had to take a break. Without a doubt, it is the most depressing movie about a killer pig there ever has been or ever will be. I shall return to it once I am emotionally strong enough. Why is this film not more fun?! To be continued…

GILMORE GIRLS

I bought the boxset of this US television series thinking it would be a straight comedy, but it appears to be more of a stodgy melodrama with some levity thrown. I’d heard good things, but I really don’t know if it’s my thing. It does have Alex “Lois Griffin” Borstein in it though, so that’s a selling point. Still, I get the feeling that, if I can’t get past the second episode, it may end up collecting dust on my bookshelf along with the detestable Community.

THE NAKED GUN REBOOT

No.

ELECTRONICOS FANTASTICOS

My new favourite band. I am talking to you less than 24-hours after discovering them. YouTube threw up one of their rehearsal videos, which I couldn’t look away from. I’m not sure what bizarre gadgets they’re playing, but they’re certainly not traditional instruments. As far as I can tell, the band is from Japan, but I dearly hope they tour the UK as soon as possible. Their music is 8-bit meets glam meets my very happy ears and is about to change the face of pop music… forever! Frustratingly, they only have the one single, featuring three tracks, on Spotify so far, but I’m guessing there’s plenty more esoteric jams on their YT channel. I WANT MORE AND YOU WILL GIVE ME MORE. Here's the video that inspired my new obsession.

LOST HORIZON

I’ve started audioreading James Hilton’s source novel for Frank Capra’s 1937 classic piece of cinema. I think I may have finally gotten through the whole film, as Capra’s work usually sends me to sleep. Not out of boredom, but there’s a tranquil quality to them that guarantees to sedate me. I must have tried watching It’s a Wonderful Life three times before finally getting to the end. And I still didn’t like the movie. The Lost Horizon novel is charmingly old fashioned and the reader a delightful eccentric. I can’t work out whether some of his decisions as a narrator are based on him wanting to infuse some acting into the dialogue, or just his own madness. Who can say.

FUTURE MARATHON

Due to the “baffling” lack of interest in the writeup for my day of Goldie Hawn films, I thought I’d go ahead and do it again! This time, I’ve decided to do three recent big budget flops. Both critically and commercially. So, Ill be watching: Borderlands, Madame Web, and Megalopolis. I’m not sure when this will take place, but I know it will hurt my face more than a charging killer pig. You are welcome to join me, just so long as you bring some dips. And you are housetrained.

Right, I guess that’s all for my big comeback post! I have some tiresome personal admin to deal with and the need to feed myself. I’m still getting used to my new sober routine, so please do honour me with your patience. Thank you for sticking with me during all my crazy.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!

GAK has gone!

So I was lying in bed last night (steady!) scrolling through the nonsense YouTube usually recommends to me, when I came across a video posted a week ago discussing the closure of Brighten-based musical equipment shop Guitar Amp & Keyboard.

Cue stunned gasp!

At first claiming to just be “closed for maintenance”, it has now been confirmed that GAK has officially gone into administration. This is very sad news for UK and, I assume, international musicians, as it was a very popular fixture of the music scene. Even guitarist John Squire from The Stone Roses sold his second-hand gear through them, I believe. At least, they sold one of his acoustic guitars a few years ago.

Sigh, the one time I didn’t have £10,000 on me!

I unfortunately never visited GAK in person, having never found myself anywhere near Brighton. However, their online store has given me, or “gave me” since I should be talking in the past tense, so much joy over the years.

And now it’s gone.

After my parents divorced in 2001 and I started to listen to slightly edgier music besides classical, I also picked up the guitar again. I had learned for a few years as a kid, finally giving up at around 15-years-old due to, well, simply not being interested in guitar music. It made perfect sense to me at the time, even though I regret the decision now.

If your “hobby” becomes an agonising chore, then perhaps you should call it a day.

Then, in 2004, having forgotten everything I’d learned as a teenager and knowing even less about electric guitars, I scoured the internet for where to purchase one. I eventually settled on GAK, who’s website became like a Bible to me. Even if I didn’t have the money to buy a guitar, I’d still trawl their site to increase my knowledge of electric guitars and the mountain of peripheral gadgets. It was laid out in a simple list design (something smartphones have generally killed off) and was joyfully comprehensive!

My first electric was a Fender Mexican Standard Stratocaster, which I absolutely loathed. My first amplifier was a Marshall transistor effects combo thingy, which I loved. Both came from GAK, who I continued to go through for the next 20 years. I’m a bit fuzzy on what my last guitar from them was, but, based on my email records, it seems to have been a semi-hollow jazz guitar with one pickup at the neck.

GAK was always a reliable company and I now regret never making the effort to pop down to Brighton for a shopping spree and maybe to hit the gay bars. It is “the San Fransisco of England”, after all.

Goodbye, GAK, you will be sorely missed by so many poor souls afflicted with Guitar Acquisition Syndrome.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!

Jet Boy (2001) - film review

For Branden Nadon

Leave it to the Canadians to produce an upbeat film with themes of drug addiction, incest, prostitution, and child neglect.

My theory about Jet Boy’s odd tone, is that the writer appreciated that these difficult themes are harrowing enough on their own, and that the audience appreciates this too, therefore the writer did not feel the need to dwell on them any further. Instead, Jet Boy is more constructively about two lonely souls who eventually find one another.

Despite some fast-paced thriller elements towards the conclusion, this is actually a very gentle movie. Almost pastoral in nature. With the largely acoustic soundtrack and purposefully-laconic editing aiding the rambling tone. And I am one who appreciates a rambling tone.

I would recommend watching Jet Boy twice, as you will find its unnecessary grand twist answering many questions you may/will have raised by the end. These questions could be called “confusion”, but I don’t feel like being that harsh. While I believe the film is old enough now to divulge this final revelation, it is central enough to the overall story that I fear it will ruin things for the reader if I do.

But a second viewing will not be hard, as, despite the aforementioned gritty themes, Jet Boy is a very charming experience. I much prefer a story that doesn’t resort to stock conflict in order to engross the audience. Such cheap writing techniques have become tragically prevalent over the past twenty years of cinema, which I’m rather sad about. Instead, Jet Boy understands that negative events are a key part of life, as well as positive events, so let’s deal with them without resorting to self-defeating outrage and righteous ranting and raving.

To boil this down to one simple phrase: shit happens.

I was initially going to describe this as a “road movie”, but our two protagonists only really spend one scene travelling any great distance together. It does have a road movie vibe though, as the characters always feel like they’re travelling somewhere, even if it’s just emotionally.

Did I really just type that?!

It’s still not terribly clear to me what the film’s title is a reference to, but I’m guessing it’s the tattoo a character has put on their arm in an early scene. If this is the case, I feel the script should have explicitly told the audience with dialogue. If not, then I’ll go ahead and assume that “Jet Boy” is meant to be ambiguous, similar to Gus Van Sant’s Elephant (a film which requires you to know nothing about it ahead of time).

The slow-paced editing, while succeeding in creating the film’s intended tone, could have been sped-up here and there, just a little, to tighten some eye-rolling dialogue. This, however, doesn’t become an issue on a second viewing, as you are by then prepared for it. Branden Nadon, in his first film role, sometimes struggles with his precocious tough-guy dialogue, but the character’s hard exterior is suppose to fall a little flat, due to his melancholic interior. It’s otherwise a captivating performance, and he holds his side of the dual-lead roles admirably.

Branden Nadon sadly passed away in 2023.

His co-star, Dylan Walsh, steps up from what I assume is a solid filmography of supporting roles (if you don’t recognise his name, you will have seen him about), to craft an incredibly likeable antihero. Walsh skilfully embellishes even the most mundane line of dialogue with his character’s complex personality and physical traits. Walsh is always on and, since they spend much of the film together, I’m guessing mentored the young Nadon as they went. The pair share an endearing chemistry, which was always going to be crucial for the story to work.

The twist ending also helps to explain certain elements of the story which I initially put down to being a symptom of the gentle Canadian spirit. In particular, one character is accidentally shot at by another, but the former doesn’t get angry about it even in the slightest. They are just mildly surprised and more concerned that the weapon’s recoil has injured the shooter. There are also interactions with side characters that raise questions, with such apparently-incomprehensible moments eventually being explained. The story works with certain information being kept from the viewer, but I would have preferred it if the writer had come up with something more open, rather than resorting to such shenanigans.

But despite my misgivings about some elements of the screenplay, it is one that injects great importance into every line. Even the seemingly-mundane. I found wearing headphones helped greatly in concentrating and picking up on some softly-spoken deliveries. There is so much detail about backstory and motivation and intention, that you will surely miss out if you take a backseat approach to what is being said. There aren’t many films out there with that much attention to detail, which is an achievement very much in Jet Boy’s favour.

It’s a pity the film doesn’t push more for accepting alternative family structures, as the ending sees our protagonists succumbing to a “normal” white, heterosexual, Anglo-Saxon, Protestant unit. This may not be the intended outcome for hypothetical events beyond the film’s cut to credits, but it certainly feels that way. Two characters divulge weighty secrets to one another during a pivotal scene, secrets that would be healthier divulged in a broader sense, but they remain secrets. However, the film hints at the notion that they may not remain secrets for very long, as the satellite characters to this moment seem open-minded enough to be trusted.

Some viewers may accuse Jet Boy of hypocrisy, with the theme of sexual exploitation being undercut by Nadon, playing much younger than his 16 years (the age of consent in Canada) spending many scenes shirtless. One could argue the character could have worn a vest, but, being pretty liberal on the subject (without condoning anything illegal), I’m fine with it. Conservative elements of our current knee-jerk society may not.

So, if you can find a copy of this potentially-controversial film (mine had to come from Germany), then I’d recommend purchasing Jet Boy without a doubt. It deals with its dark issues without resorting to bad melodrama in order to provoke unhelpful emotions from its viewers. The film is calm, rational, logical, and, most importantly, filled with hope and love. If I never watch it again, I will certainly never forget it.

A very sweet film indeed.

Oh and I’m not sure whether it was intentional or not, but during one scene a character walks by a sign that reads: “FREE PARKING IN REAR”, just after said character, a rent boy, has offered their body up to another character at no charge.

Just thought I’d leave on that note.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!

RIP Gene Hackman

It seems strange to me that Mr Hackman was around 50 years old about the time I was born. I’m guessing he started late in his acting career, but he was always there, like a fixture of the scenery.

He certainly transcended the Hollywood movie star ideal. He wasn’t particularly good looking, and he always played bastards. But he always had a twinkle in his eye, which is something I call “The Arnold Schwarzenegger Effect”. Although, by contrast, Hackman was without a doubt a skilled actor, whereas Arnold is not.

I’ve been watching The French Connection over the past few days, in which Hackman plays a delightful badass. He’s the epitome of the “antihero”, in which he is downright mean, bigoted, and rebellious to the point of being criminal, but he’s likeable. Again, he has that twinkle in his eye.

To get to my belaboured point, Gene Hackman was likeable, even when he was playing unpleasant characters. He just seemed like a nice chap. Visually speaking, he also reminds me heavily of my own father, although, it must be said, that Mr Hackman probably had a few more twigs to rub together in his brain than my father.

We have lost a true icon, even though he was ugly as hell.

Do stay in touch, darling.

Toodles!

All capital letters or no capital letters

Apparently, this is the innovative new trend in music.

How far we’ve come.

Sigh.

I FEEL LIKE A PRINCESS

Bob’s Burgers - viewing update

Still loving it.

I am now completely obsessed with Louise, the show’s mischievous antagonist. I may even buy a replica of her bunny ears beanie. I’m not sure where I will wear it. I just want one.

I am also now fairly convinced that Bob’s Burger’s is, in reality, a secret spinoff of American Dad, following the adventures of one of Roger Smith’s longterm female personas.

Her name is “Linda”.

Tell me I’m wrong.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!

FIRST IMPRESSIONS: Bob’s Burgers

Another show recommended by, well, an ex-friend this time. I’m not very good at maintaining long-term acquaintances. In my defence, I do now warn people in advance.

Anyway…

It’s taken me awhile to try out Bob’s Burger’s, for a few reasons. These reasons are a) the animation style looked hideous to me b) a show about a burger bar was off-putting for some reason and c) the poor UK physical distribution industry meant/means there’s no nice, shiny boxset for me to buy.

I’m a nerd. Nerd’s like collecting stuff.

Well, regardless of the above reasons, I decided to purchase a digital copy of the first season and give it a whirl. I thought this would also help in my recovery from a particularly severe low-mood period. Laughter is the best medicine, after all!

Well, I’m already enchanted by the show’s kookiness and, most importantly, pinch of heart. While I respect comedies like Seinfeld and South Park, their lack of warmth means they rarely get a viewing in my home (although I do own them). Bob and family, however, are proving to have a bit of everything!

Possibly the driving force behind my inextinguishable intention to track down the show is the fabulous Kristen Schaal, who is absolutely on my list of all-time favourite people. Her character, funnily enough, is proving so far to be my favourite. I’d ask why she’s wearing a beanie with bunny ears, but I get that she’s just like that. I just start chuckling every time it cuts to her face.

I was also surprised and delighted to discover H Jon Benjamin voicing the titular character, as I love his work on the Seth MacFarlane shows. He also has a great little cameo in an episode of Parks & Recreation as the city’s nervous attorney.

 

It’s a shame the show features your bog-standard heterosexual-nuclear-family, complete with nagging wife, henpecked husband, and brood of anxiety-inducing children, but this at least has the unique twist of being set amidst a bustling urban environment. In this regard, it reminds me somewhat of the great Hey Arnold!, especially with one of Bob’s daughter’s being prematurely depressed and low-energy.

I’ve actually just forced myself to stop watching for a spell, as I actually want to savour it for as long as possible. Apparently there’s a movie too, so I’ll see if I can get my hands on that.

So, yes, while not quite as “late to the party” as I was with House M.D., I’m still kicking myself for not jumping on the Bob’s Burgers bandwagon sooner.

Do stay in touch, darlings.

Toodles!