I know I said I was going on an indefinite writer’s strike, thanks to AI training bots scanning our very souls, but hopefully you understand by now that I say a lot of things. I don’t have one of those sexy consistent mental health problems that gets you on television, instead it just leads to a life of regret, alcoholism, and self-doubt. Still, I’ll leave that post up as some sort of political banner for future generations to worship.
So, yes, after almost a year of guitar-related silence, caused mainly by the UK being battered by four intense heatwaves in a row and a case of, what I believe was, tonsillitis sapping my will to live, I’ve finally started literally dusting off my music equipment to hopefully do something creative. You know, instead of sitting in front of the TV drinking myself into a pathetic stupor.
As always, please be aware that these posts feature me reporting on a hobby. I’m not giving professional advice about music equipment and sound recording. Quite the opposite, I’m simply logging my ongoing attempts to understand the complex world of technology, which I am something of a scaredy-cat about.
If you have a short-temper or behave as a “gatekeeper” within the world of nerds, then I implore you to turn back now.
MUSIC NOOK
During my year-long hiatus, my beloved music nook, which sits in the corner of my living room, had become something of a dumping ground. I do live in a one-bedroom council flat, after all, so space is limited. Basically, the route to my amplifier zone was blocked by random crap, which is now blocking my exit from my home. I need to shift it all back today actually, as there’s a delivery on the way. Still, even after that initial tidy, I needed to rewire my pedalboard-that’s-not-a-pedalboard, as it’d all become so tangled-up that I believe some of the cables had crossed over into another dimension. This sort of chaos can actually affect your signal chain, which did keep cutting out on me, so having a complete reconnecting session improved my sanity greatly.
KLON KTR OVERDRIVE
Well, once I’d finally gotten into my music nook and done some spring cleaning, I had a couple of new (albeit second-hand) pedals to try out. Klons are highly sought after, although I believe there was some controversy regarding the ridiculous asking price for them, so I wonder whether this one had an extra zero at the end of its price a few years ago. So, who better to become the custodian of the Holy Grail of boutique FX pedals than me - an apathetic idiot who can barely string two chords together?! Don’t answer that. I haven’t looked up anything about this particular model, preferring just to plug it in and give it a go. My first impression is that it’s a solid rock machine, with a particularly dark growl to it. It should pair well with my walnut Rickenbacker, which purrs like a hungry kitty on a tumble dryer.
SOLA SOUND TONE BENDER
The second of my “new” pedals is so old it doesn’t even have a connection for a power lead. You have to open the fucker up and insert a battery. Crazy, huh?! Being more of a plug-and-play kinda gal, this terrified me, but I got my mucky fingers in there in the end. Thank you, inventor of the flathead screwdriver! Sadly, I’ve not been able to get it to work yet. My signal passes through it, but the fuzz ain’t fuzzing. I wonder whether the in/out sockets are the opposite way round to the usual. That’s happened to me before with a delay pedal that’s still in my collection, so I’ll try fiddling about. It only occurred to me to try swapping the leads round after 11 pm last night, when loud guitar playing is officially counted as “antisocial behaviour”. Saying that, my playing any time of the day is pretty antisocial. I shall report back!
IBANEZ 1978 ARTIST 2618
I’ve wanted an Ibanez double-cutaway guitar for years and years. But, of course, the second I developed a longing for one, Ibanez seemed to stop producing them. Ha! Sod’s-bloody-law. I was actually after one of the 420s, which have loads more fun switches and dials to play about with, but I’ll take this genuinely vintage beauty. It’s not a reissue, having clearly been banged about to hell and back. Anyone not interested in guitar playing will think that that’s a bad thing, but us dumbass players love some life bashed into our second-hand instruments. We’ll even pay extra for a new model to be “aged” for us. Initially, I thought one of this particular one’s many owners over the years had replaced the original humbuckers with “hot” modern metal ones, as even the lowest amount of distortion made me sound like Billy Corgan. But, no, it sounds “normal” now. Maybe that initial high-gain burst was to do with the untidiness of my signal chain. Regardless, it’s a beautiful machine that will certainly belong in my permanent collection. It’s so pretty!
COMPRESSION
I’m keeping my preferred compression pedal, the MXR Dyna Comp, on all the time now, so as I get used to it for when I start trying to record again. Compression usually makes me feel a little seasick, what with how you’re expressing yourself on the instrument being purposefully capped by the pedal, but I’m sure I can conquer my natural aversion eventually. I believe compression is why my early recordings 20-years-ago still sound so good - I was feeding my playing through the Line6 Floor Pod Plus, which has a compressor built in. I just didn’t understand what it was or even realise I was using it at the time. It’s okay, I get by on my looks!
Right, I think I’ll leave things there for now. I don’t want to burnout too quickly during my apprehensive return. I’m still getting phantom stats from AI bots, but I suppose that’s what I get for not supporting my own blog on social media. Is anyone even on there anymore? I had over a hundred views yesterday alone, but only four were regarding a particular post. The rest were what I call “front page” views. Hey-ho, what is one to do?! Nothing, I guess, unless the government or lawyers start stepping in. I can stop my posts coming up in search engines altogether, but how on Earth will my genius be discovered posthumously if I do that?!
Don’t answer that either.
So, yes, I shall leave my fabulous human readers to their warm-hearted goings on, and curse my robot infiltrators for scanning my hard work to help kids cheat on their homework and publishers to fire their writing staff.
Do stay in touch, darlings.
Toodles!
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